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Emotional Sobriety has long been utilized in 12-Step community - But Emotional Sobriety is for everyone. It's a way of life - to take control of your life and the roll you play every day. It's where you essentially work on yourself, to grow, regulate your emotions (or how you react), accepting others for who they are, setting boundaries, working on unhealthy patterns, and releasing resentments.

So why is this the best kept secret?

Why isn't this readily available for those outside of the 12-Step Community?

These are questions my husband and I have pondered. I am in the 12 Step Community, but he is not - he doesn't need to be. As I do the work on myself, he notices the changes, asks me about it, and comments on how much I've grown, how I react differently to situations now. He thinks everyone should have this program whether in recovery or not - and I agree!

"It means being "happy, joyous, and free,"


  • Learning to process emotions in a healthy way

  • Addressing your trauma, resentments and unhealthy patterns in your life

  • Being a part of a community with the same goals as yourself, hold you accountable, and a safe place to share. Listen and learn. Get out of yourself.

  • Showing up every day, keeping commitments.

  • Having a mentor, who you can call/text when times are tough. Having someone you truly trust who has your wellness in mind and no judgment. This person is not a "friend" but a "mentor" who is there to get you where you want to be. If your Mentor becomes your friend, it's time to find another mentor.

  • Feeling and working on your emotions, never running away or avoiding any uncomfortable feelings.

  • Setting healthy personal boundaries.

  • Setting aside X amount of time weekly to connect to the community, doing work on yourself.

  • Practicing Self-care.

  • Knowing you are doing your best every day, if you need to rest, you rest.

  • Making amends to all those whom you've harmed, to cleanse the baggage of that you've been carrying around.

  • Letting go of the past, but never forgetting it - as the past always teaches us, we learn and grow from the past.

  • Doing a Daily check-in at the end of the day with ourselves to see if there was anywhere we could've done better / if we owe any amends for our behavior.

  • Meditating.

  • Connecting to your higher power (whatever that may be, you get to decide).

  • Learning about yourself and growing as a person, to be the best version of yourself you can be!

Doesn't this all sound nice? Isn't this something we all would like to do?

That is emotional sobriety. And that's why you should try it!

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